Broken: (McIntyre Security Bodyguard Series - Book 3) Read online

  Jonah leans close to the mic. “Ladies and gentlemen, Makayla Hendricks.”

  Makayla waves, and the audience roars with applause loud enough to shake the rafters. Makayla beams from ear to ear. She’s obviously in her element, on stage in front of an adoring crowd, and she’s clearly enjoying the attention. Jonah starts strumming his guitar, playing a plaintive, simple melody, and they begin to sing.

  I really don’t want to see this. I lean over to Beth. “I’m going to the bathroom. I’ll be back.”

  She grabs my hand. “Don’t you dare leave!” she hisses.

  The power couple on stage have the rapt attention of the audience, and the room is hushed as they sing their romantic duet. I hear a ringing in my ears, and my vision narrows to the two people on stage. I know it’s just a performance, and I know he doesn’t want her anymore, but a knot forms in my stomach as I watch them gazing at each other as they sing. It’s a duet, I tell myself. Of course they’re singing to each other. Of course they’re supposed to look at each other. But I struggle. I’ve never felt jealously before, and I have to admit I don’t like it. It makes me feel out of control.

  As the song comes to a close, they’re standing face to face on stage, with a single spotlight shining down on them. The crowd hushes as Jonah and Makayla gaze at each other as they sing the final refrain in perfect harmony, their faces only inches apart. My throat closes up and I stop breathing. The audience falls silent.

  As the song ends, Makayla leans toward him with a smile on her face, with the obvious intention of kissing him. But he deftly turns his face to the side, giving her his cheek to kiss instead.

  Jonah turns to the audience. “Ladies and gentlemen, let’s hear it for Makayla Hendricks!”

  The crowd goes crazy, screaming with approval, and Makayla – looking flustered at Jonah’s swift dismissal – takes a reluctant bow and heads off stage.

  Jonah’s the only one left on the stage, and he waits patiently while the thunderous applause for Makayla dies down. I’m expecting him to say good night to the crowd and take his exit, too. But he just stands there, patiently waiting for the crowd’s attention.

  The spotlight dims a little, leaving him in a soft pool of light surrounded by a sea of darkness. He adjusts his guitar strap over his shoulder and leans into the microphone, all the while looking right at me. My heart starts pounding.

  “I want to thank you all for coming here tonight,” Jonah says. “I love playing small venues like this, where I can actually look out beyond the stage and see real people in the audience, and not just an ocean of impersonal bodies and lighters.”

  There are some quiet chuckles from the audience.

  “Tonight marks a big turning point in my career – in my life. I’m retiring from the band after tonight.”

  There are numerous gasps in the audience and a quiet murmur at his announcement. I’m shocked myself. I had no idea he’d made up his mind and was ready to announce his plans.

  “From now on, I’ll just be Jonah Locke, a guy who writes songs and performs to small crowds once in a while. But first, I have one more song I want to sing on this stage tonight. This is a song I’ve been working on the last few days, written for a special someone who’s in the audience tonight.”

  Jonah signals Ruben, and a second spotlight shines down on me, and I hear the shuffling of bodies and chairs as scores of people turn to look at me. My face heats up at the unwanted attention, but I still can’t take my eyes off Jonah.

  “I dedicate this song to someone very special to me, Lia McIntyre. It’s called I’ll Catch You.”

  As soon as he begins picking out the melody, I recognize it as the song he’s been working on all week.

  I’m falling for a girl

  With sunshine hair

  And eyes that tear me apart

  Fierce and lovely

  She steals my heart

  But she’s just playing a part

  Let me be there for you

  Through your highs and your lows

  Let me be there for you

  I’ll catch you when you fall

  I’m falling for a girl

  Who thinks she’s broken

  Because deep inside

  Fierce and lovely

  Is where the old wounds hide

  But she can’t see what I see

  Let me be there for you

  Through your highs and your lows

  Let me be there for you

  I’ll catch you when you fall

  You’re always so strong

  Let me be strong for you

  Let me shoulder the weight of the world for once

  Let me be there for you

  Through your highs and your lows

  Let me be there for you

  I’ll catch you when you fall

  Let go of the past

  The future is ours

  You don’t have to be the strong one

  We can be strong for each other

  Let me be there for you

  Through your highs and your lows

  Let me be there for you

  I’ll catch you when you fall

  As he sings these beautiful lyrics – to me – my skin tingles from head to toe, and my head is reeling. My vision dims and he’s all I see. It’s as if the rest of the room has fallen away, leaving just the two of us. The lyrics of this beautiful song take on a new significance, and I can’t believe he’s baring his soul to me like this, in front of over two hundred captivated people. I don’t deserve this. I don’t deserve him.

  When the song comes to a gentle end, the audience remains hushed, as though hypnotized. It’s so quiet in the bar that we probably could hear a pin drop. Jonah sets his guitar down, propping it against his stool, then hops off the stage and comes right for me, pulling me out of my chair and taking me in his arms and kissing me in front of a captive audience.

  I’m half laughing, half crying at his grand gesture, and glorying in the feel of his strong arms wrapped around me. For a moment, I can forget everything. Forget who I am, who he is, and just revel in this moment. I revel in the feeling of him pressed up against me, towering over me, wrapping me in his strength. The vice on my heart contracts, squeezing it painfully.

  The lights come up, and the audience shoots to their feet, applauding. The rest of the band comes out from behind the stage to join us, along with Dwight, who’s actually smiling for a change. Jonah keeps his arm around me as his band mates slap him on the back. He keeps me at his side as he accepts all the well wishes and compliments for a great show. Beth is beaming at me, with tears in her eyes, and she steps forward to give me a hug. Even Shane looks pleased.

  I honestly don’t think I’ve ever been this happy in my life. I feel like, for the first time in a very long time, everything is right in my world. I have my family near me as well as the only man I’ve ever trusted, and I realize then that it’s okay for me to love him. It’s okay to trust, it’s okay to let go of the past.

  I look up into Jonah’s face, and he leans down to kiss me.

  I return his stupid smile, at a complete loss for words. Blinking back tears, I shake my head at him. “You’re crazy, you know that?”

  Something catches Jonah’s attention, and he looks past me just as Makayla walks up, holding out her phone, which she shoves in Jonah’s face.

  Jonah grabs the phone before she can hit him in the face with it.

  “Watch!” she says.

  Jonah pales as he looks at the video playing on her phone. It’s way too loud in the place to hear the audio, but it only takes me two seconds to recognize the video. It’s me, six years ago, naked in broad daylight, straddling Logan Wintermeyer’s hips as he thrusts hard up into me. There’s a frightened, pained expression on my face, and my wan cheeks are wet with tears. Like an outsider, I stare at that girl, so young and so naive – it’s a moment frozen in time, captured for all eternity, and destined to haunt her for the rest of her life.

  In that split second, the
bottom falls out of my world. My stomach heaves violently, and I know I’m going to be sick. Hot bile rises into my mouth, burning my throat and warning me of what’s about to come. My worst nightmare has come true – I never wanted Jonah to see that video. But it’s too late; the damage is done, and it can’t ever be undone.

  In a split second, as soon as he realizes what he’s looking at, Jonah grabs the phone from Makayla and shuts down the video, then shoves the phone in his back pocket. Makayla makes a grab for it, but he shoves her back so hard she topples on her spiked heels and falls hard to the floor.

  “I told you it was her!” Makayla screams as she scrabbles to her feet. “She made a sex tape, Jonah! Are you seriously going to tell me you’re in love with a porn star?”

  Chapter 39

  My mind is playing tricks on me, as my hearing fades in and out. I feel like I’m stuck on one of those amusement park rides that spins a million miles an hour in a circle, centrifugal force plastering the poor defenseless riders against the cage wall of the ride. I’m pinned there, frozen in time, stuck as this debacle plays out in front of me.

  A furious Shane gives an abrupt hand signal, and two security guards grab Makayla and haul her backstage, despite all of her kicking and screaming. But it’s too late. The damage is done.

  Beth looks absolutely gutted, and her blue-green eyes glitter with tears. She reaches for me, but I pull back, shaking my head. I turn and head for the hallway that leads out the rear door of the building.

  “Lia, wait!” Jonah shouts.

  I can hear Jonah’s boots thundering on the hardwood floor as he chases after me. But the crowd is in his way, and I’m fast. He can’t catch me if I don’t want him to, and I don’t. I need to be alone. I can’t be around anyone right now.

  I bust out the rear door to the back alley just in time to empty my stomach on the pavement. I continue around the building to the parking lot where my Jeep is parked, and I’m pulling out of the parking lot just as Jonah comes into view.

  I’m so blinded by tears, I can barely to see to drive. Fresh ones appear just as soon as I brush the old ones away. My heart is thundering in my chest and there’s a roaring in my ears. My phone rings nonstop, but I turn it off and shove it into my pocket.

  By some miracle, I make it through the crowded Chicago streets and arrive back at my apartment building. I don’t even remember parking, and before I know it, I’m riding up in the elevator to my apartment on the 46th floor. Once inside the relative safety of my apartment, I grab a brand new bottle of whisky out of a kitchen cupboard and collapse with it onto the sofa, sitting in the dark with only the moonlight coming through the glass balcony door for company.

  Tears scald my cheeks as I sob like I haven’t sobbed for years. It all comes back to me, like it just happened yesterday. I can’t bare knowing that Jonah saw the video, even just a few seconds of it. The pain, the humiliation, the utter betrayal is burned into my brain. Millions of people saw that video when it first came out, and somehow Makayla got a copy of it. And God knows what she’s done with it. I wouldn’t be surprised if she’s already posted it online. I don’t know how she got it, but it doesn’t really matter at this point. The damage is done.

  I open the bottle of whisky and swallow a mouthful, choking on the fiery liquid as it burns a path down my throat. But I welcome the pain. I take another swig and another, bringing on a coughing fit. My stomach feels like it’s on fire. I want to drink myself into oblivion so I can’t feel another thing as long as I live.

  Somewhere off in the distance, there’s a steady pounding as heavy fists beat against a door. I wonder why someone doesn’t answer it. The pounding is quickly followed by shouts and pleas, but still no one answers.

  I swallow as much whisky as I can and let the poison burn a path to my belly. As my vision dims around the edges, I hear a crash and the sound of splintering wood. And then I hear nothing.

  Chapter 40

  I’m floating in a fuzzy sea of darkness and pain, trying to block out all the voices and people around me. I recognize Beth’s voice – the only feminine one of the bunch. The rest are Shane, Cooper, and … and the one I can’t face. Jonah. One of them pries the bottle of whisky out of my hand. One of them brushes the hair back from my hot, wet face.

  Why won’t they leave me alone? Why won’t they let me drink myself to oblivion?

  “Is she all right?” That’s obviously Beth. “How much did she drink?”

  “It looks like it’s a new bottle, so she couldn’t have drunk that much. I think she just passed out. She’ll be okay.” Shane.

  “Let’s let her sleep it off.” Cooper. “Poor kid.”

  “I’m carrying her to bed.” Jonah.

  Strong arms lift me off the sofa and carry me through the apartment, down the hallway toward my bedroom. I know from the scent alone that it’s Jonah, but I don’t open my eyes because I’m a fucking coward. He lowers me gently onto my bed, and my stomach churns violently. I roll over and vomit into the plastic trashcan beside my bed, puking up some quality whisky.

  The mattress dips as Jonah sits beside me and holds back my hair. “Are you okay?” he says, feeling my forehead.

  I close my eyes and roll onto my back, groaning. I can’t bring myself to look at him.

  “I’ll empty the trashcan,” he says. He’s back in a few moments, placing the rinsed out trashcan beside my bed, just in case, I’m sure. “Helluva night, huh?” he says, stroking my hair. When I don’t answer, he continues. “So, did you like my song? In case it wasn’t obvious enough, that was me declaring myself to you in front of the whole world. And I mean that literally because, trust me, the music video will be up on YouTube before morning.”

  My heart is pounding. I can’t believe he’s acting so damn casual, like nothing’s wrong! He saw the video... well, he saw a few seconds of the video. It’s one thing to know it exists, but it’s something entirely different to actually see it. He saw me, naked, exposed, humiliated.

  “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to,” he says, still playing with my hair. “It was quite a shock. I get that. Shane said he’ll find out how Makayla got a copy of the video. He’s pretty sure it came from Wintermeyer, and if he’s right, then Wintermeyer violated a court order, and we might be able to press charges.”

  We? I can’t stand his nonchalance, his easy acceptance. I open my eyes and glare at him. “What the fuck are you doing here?”

  He looks affronted. “Where else would I be?”

  “I don’t know – maybe out signing autographs? I saw the fan-girls lined up and down the street outside Rowdy’s tonight.”

  “You know I don’t care about that.” He frowns. “Who the hell are you, and what did you do with my Lia? Where’s the kick-ass ninja I know and love?”

  Love? He doesn’t mean it. He can’t, not after seeing that video.

  He brushes his thumb over my cheek. “You never did say if you liked my song.”

  I look at him, trying to decide if he’s crazy or just playing me. He must be crazy, because I honestly don’t think he’s playing me. He’s too honest. I shrug. “It was fine.”

  He looks crestfallen. “It was fine? That’s it? I’ll have you know, I wrote that song in about two days, which is a record for me. I thought it turned out pretty well.”

  I elbow him. “Oh, shut up. Stop fishing for compliments. You know it was amazing.”

  He grins, but then he sobers. “Lia, honey, it doesn’t matter. That video doesn’t define you. All I saw was a young girl betrayed in a cruel, heartless way by an asshole. It’s no reflection on you.”

  “It’s a sex tape!”

  He shakes his head. “No. It was a violation of your privacy, of your trust, but it wasn’t a sex tape. And you need to let it go. No one can make you a victim without your consent, Lia. Please don’t give it to them.”

  He has no idea how this has haunted me, eating away at me like a disease. It’s impacted my life, my relationships, everything! How can he dis
miss it so easily?

  He reaches for my hand. “Do you know what went through my head when I saw the video?”

  “What?”

  “I thought, Damn, that girl is fierce.”

  I shake my head. “You just saw about two seconds of it.”

  “Baby, you’ve got to put that behind you and move on. You can’t change the past, it’s water under the bridge, but you’re damn sure in control of your future. You taught me that.”

  I hear my apartment door close and realize the others left once they realized Jonah and I were talking, and I wasn’t in danger of jumping out a window.

  I reach for Jonah’s hand. “Thank you.”

  He squeezes my hand. “For what?”

  “For trying to make it all right.”

  “But it is all right. That tape isn’t about you, Lia. It’s about Logan Wintermeyer and what an ass he is.”

  Jonah pulls off his boots and climbs in bed with me, pulling me into his arms. I lay my head on his chest, my ear right over the steady beating of his heart.

  He strokes my hair with gentle fingers. “We’re not all asses, you know. Let me prove it to you.” And then he starts singing the chorus of his new song again.

  Let me be there for you

  Through your highs and your lows

  Let me be there for you

  I’ll catch you when you fall

  His voice seeps into me, sinking deep beneath my skin and into my heart.

  * * *

  I must have fallen asleep to the sound of Jonah singing to me. When I awake, it’s still dark outside my bedroom window. According to my alarm clock, it’s two-thirty in the morning. I’m lying in Jonah’s arms, and he’s propped up against my pillows, asleep. This is the earliest I’ve seen him fall asleep. He must have been as wiped out as I was.